have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize