Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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