we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
