Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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