what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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