Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
