Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
