Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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