First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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