what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
