i don't want you to think of me as your TA
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
sick fucks of a feather flock together
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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