No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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