NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize