check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Randomize
