Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
My dad is sitting where you rode me
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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