Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
handjob tips. give me some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
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