I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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