don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
