The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
only you would photoshop your dick
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that