Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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