I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
