doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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