Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
