Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize