there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize