And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
