We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize