You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize