There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
