yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize