I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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