Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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