I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize
