kristin has been a bad kristin
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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