best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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