I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize