She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
