im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
