Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Randomize