Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
