How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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