dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
