hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize