The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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