i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize