I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
