I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
This is not my ceiling
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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