Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
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