did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Randomize