the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize