Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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